One month ago today I stopped posting on my FB page. I pretty much stopped posting on there at all – I didn’t share anything, I wished 2-3 people a happy birthday (as opposed to the many others I did not – sorry guys), I left only a few comments and posted a thing or two on other pages. Even this blog is only posted to Twitter now. My notifications dropped to mostly game invites.
And no one seemed to notice. And I was glad.
Today is the 9th anniversary of the day my conjoined other half and I became FB friends, so they made us a little video, which I posted to our walls this morning. Then I changed my cover photo to the pic of Hudson and I that I love so, so much.
That’s not to say that I am back to posting regularly on FB, or anything, though. I’m enjoying the time apart.
Which reminds me, there’s really only a few weeks left of this blog! The end of the year approach-eth! I think it’s safe to say (as I’ve said before) that it’s been a complete and utter fail. Yesterday I actually found the blurb which had inspired me to try and write this every day, too, and while I’m not exactly sure why I’d started off with such a different intention in mind, I do think the notion still has merit. I have a few ideas for what I might try instead, and hopefully any of those will yield better results for me. Because it is supposed to be about improving myself, after all. Why I thought I’d take any steps forward with a blog like this – one which never bothers to even scratch the surface, let alone dig deeper than that – is truly beyond me, but I am glad it’s almost done. I feel like I’ve become so accustomed to NOT communicating anything valid or real that I’m not sure I’ll be able to when I need to, now, either.
Luckily my therapist pushes me, but it’s actually a habit now for me to not push myself. And I rarely see her, so yeah. I’m regressing, instead of progressing, I think.
Hopefully whatever I do next will be more rewarding and positive than this has been. And as always, there’s so much more that I want to do, or even just to try. I don’t make New Years resolutions or anything like that, but maybe this year I can at least work more towards that turning point I seem to be on the cusp of, and really push myself to become a more active participant in my own life. It’ll mean some hard choices, and definitely lots of mistakes and disappointment, but at least it’ll be more mine, and less the facade I present.
If I do anything at all. I guess I’ll see! haha
Inventory Of Everything 
Why do you think it’s been such a failure? You posted every day. Kept us up to date. I disagreed with you on what was personal and what was not or at least what you felt had meaning. I think you succeeded wonderfully. But you’ll probably disagree with me on that as well. LOL
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I missed TONS of days. But the fact that I kept it superficial instead of trying to write in a way that allowed me to express myself is more of what made it a failure. I’m glad you think it was successful, but at the same time, I was trying to do something for ME, and I did not. At all. You have no idea what’s actually gone on this year in my life, nor how it’s affected me. Nor how I’ve affected it. I made a blog of small talk, and now it”s almost done, which is good, because I think on my end it’s done far more harm than help.
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Basically, though, it boils down to this: the blog did not even remotely fulfill its intended purpose. Therefore, it’s a failure. -I- am not the failure, but this experiment has been. I’ll just try something else next time.
Given that I’m the only one who knows what the intended purpose was/is, I don’t feel that anyone else is in a position to make anything other than an uninformed opinion. 😉
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Oh I did not realize that the purpose was not stated. I thought the purpose was to just see if you could post every day for a year. Like a challenge for yourself. Maybe at the end you could tell us what the purpose was and why you feel it was a failure.
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Ha no. The purpose is personal.
Even if it had just been a challenge to post every day for a year, it’d still have been a failure. I generally only post on work days, over my lunch break! Haha
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Well I enjoyed reading it and by that I don’t mean I found joy in the parts where you were sad or angry but I did like reading about your volunteering, how you feel about your animals, the trips to the zoo, your observations, etc.
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And that’s great!
For me, though, not being forthcoming about the truth in those things has done more harm.than good. I’m glad you got something positive from it. I, however, have not.
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