Tick Tock

My vote count in the photo contest has gone over 100 today! So awesome! I’m still in the lead – I think the next person closest to me as around 80 votes – so now I just have to stay there until Sunday night at midnight! I realized earlier that I was so obsessed with the possibility of winning a GoPro that I’d forgotten the other awesome aspects of the first place prize – tickets to the CN Tower and having my photo featured in the 2017 magazine and coupon book. Those are pretty fantastic, too! I haven’t been up the Tower since I was here in Grade 8 on a field trip with my class.

So if you haven’t yet, and you have a Facebook account, please go vote for my CN Tower reflection photo on page 8 at this link: http://snaptoit2016.pgtb.me/m3SM8X/lnt7l And tell everyone you can think of to do it, too! Let’s get me a GoPro to play with, and the chance to take even more photos than I already do! πŸ˜‰

I was also thinking I might (one of these days) re-jig my Flickr account to highlight what I feel are my best photos from over the years. I am far from photographer level, but I might be able to convince people I’m an amateur, at least. If in turns of having an eye for some things, rather than the equipment or the training or the consistency in talent. Just a vague occasional visual sense. But it could make for a pretty cool Flickr page.

On my way home from work last night, I had a pretty cool idea for a possible Guinness World Record attempt. I was having trouble determining what the actual title would be, and there wasn’t anything that I could find on their website that was similar to what I want to do, so I emailed the basic initial idea to Tim this morning, and he got pretty excited about it, too. Part of me wants to try setting something up even if GWR doesn’t approve it as an official attempt, just because it would be cool marketing and something different that I don’t think has really been done before.

I keep wanting to do things that are a little different, apparently. It’s always been there, that desire to be a little extra creative and stand out in certain ways (not in some ways, though, hence my attempts to be invisible as a kid). I find the ideas and passion behind them are coming more frequently now as I grow older. I keep feeling the need to leave my mark in positive (or just super cool and creative) ways.

Maybe that’s my version of a biological clock.

Accept The Journey

Man, I am so distracted by something I can’t talk about that I’m having trouble thinking of something to talk about.

I allowed myself to be hypnotized once. Well, I guess twice, but I don’t really remember the second time very much.

It was at a convention of sorts, and one of the guests was a friend of mine (IS a friend of mine, but WAS a guest), and on the side he was getting his certificate, or whatever it’s called, to be a professional hypnotist. He needed to do some practice sessions on groups, and so the convention people put in a time slot for him on each of the event’s two days.

I started off in the audience with everyone else, but then somehow ended up on the stage as part of the volunteer group of test subjects.

Now, I was always pretty sure that hypnosis would not actually work on me. Not as an ego thing, but rather due to the impression I have of my mind always being so active. I’m not good at quieting it and focusing only on my own breathing, for example. Believe me, I try and fail every night before I fall asleep. I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to slow it down enough to think about only one thing at a time ever, and definitely not while sitting on a stage in front of a packed room full of strangers and friends.

Here’s the thing, though – I’d neglected to take my over-active imagination into account. My very creatively visual mind, coupled with the fact that I really like the sound of my friend’s voice made me a pretty perfect candidate for hypnosis, as it turned out! Enough so that I was even asked to be one of the volunteers for the next day’s session, as well. But that’s the one I don’t really remember. The first time, though, I remember – at least how it felt – very well even to this day.

I found the hypnotist’s voice to be soothing, and calming, and it made me want to please him. Not like THAT, guys. But I wanted to do the things he asked; wanted him to be proud of me. And after the heavy books and such, the main imagery was all stuff I really wanted to see – and could see, in vivid detail, in my mind. To the point where I was actually quite sad when it was over.

It’s definitely a trust thing, I think. For me, at least. I trusted him not to embarrass me, or have me do anything for which I’d be ridiculed after. In fact, it felt for the most part like the whole thing was about me – about calming me, and about giving me a nice visual and emotional experience aboard one of my favourite spaceships. It felt peaceful, like a brief respite from every day life, and that feeling lingered long after. Still kind of now, as I look back on it.

I think if I had fought against it, mentally, then it would not have worked. The difference was that I really wanted it to work; I wanted him to be proud and I wanted to take the journey he was offering me. I think as sad as I was when it was over, I’d have been even more sad had it never started in the first place.

Which, really, is probably something we should all keep in mind as we journey through this thing called life, isn’t it?

Lists and Wishes

I feel like I’m getting a lot done today, but at the same time, I feel like it’s all happening really slowly. Like I could do more if everything else could keep up with my brain, or something.

Which is silly, really, because my brain isn’t all that quick on the uptake or anything anymore. Keeping up with it shouldn’t be that difficult for, say, technology. Or dolphins. The rest of my body is, of course, another matter entirely, but still. I feel like everything has slowed down today, and yet there is a ton of work still to be done.

I actually have to make lists all the time, because I forget things. I’ve even started a list for my upcoming weekend, of everything I want and/or have to get done. I say β€œstarted” a list, because I’m not sure it’ll ever be complete. It’s already ridiculously long, but stuff keeps either coming up, or I remember to add it to the list because I’ve apparently already forgotten it at least once.

I even forgot to start making the list until last night.

Speaking of last night, I had a pretty excellent conversation with one of my closest friends via text before I went to bed. I wish we could talk in person like that, actually. And while there’s still much not said or discussed, it was closer to the kind of conversation we used to have, and I’ve missed it a lot. Even when I can’t find the words I want to express myself, I like the struggle to search for them. It means it matters to me that I get it right, or as close to right as I can. It means I’m trying because it’s important to me, and I don’t really do that very often. Not recently, anyway.

That conversation was probably the main reason why I didn’t even get up to pee in the night, which I always do. It made me tired in a good way, and I ended up sleeping right through. I don’t remember waking up at all, and at the moment I can’t remember anything I may or may not have dreamed. I was out.

Okay, those double chocolate chip cookies with peanut butter in the middle from Tim Horton’s are ridiculously delicious. I got one earlier to have after I ate my lunch today and daaaaamn! Distractingly good!

So much I want to do, guys. Things coming up that I’m not sure I can afford, several things I want to create in some form or another. I wish there was a way to take a kind of sabbatical from life, to work on other things and see what you can accomplish over even a few months away from your daily routine. Maybe I’d take a class. Maybe I’d start a side business. Or volunteer. Or sit at the zoo everyday and learn from the animals. Or go on a trip and learn from animals in the wild. I’d write more. I’d read more. I’d launch Mind Reels and SmitheeTV into the stratosphere. I’d spoil the critters who live with me just by being there with them. Maybe I’d even shoot my short film. I’d do everything right, if I had the time. And the money. Even if I didn’t have quite enough of either, I’d still be creative enough to do everything well.

It’s just so hard to stay on top of anything extra when I’m up for 2 hours before I have to leave for work, then need about as much time when I get home before I go to bed. And I go to bed crazy early now, if I can. Not because I’m no longer a night person, but I am really really not a morning person anymore. I need more sleep just to function, and the main reason I even got out of bed and moving as early as I did this morning was because I had to pee. Because I’d had a good text conversation with my friend before I fell asleep and it tired me out enough to sleep until my alarm went off. One little thing like that and the effect trickled down into today.

As tired as I am, though, the good effects from that convo also trickled down into today, which doesn’t often happen with trickle-down situations.

That means it was worth it.